Personal Email List

I will email you how to become Michael Brecker with no practice, the meaning of life, my secret to losing weight, and how to succeed on Tinder.

After you subscribe, I will personally call your childhood bully and your ex-wife to tell them how badly they messed up.

Thanks! I don't know the meaning of life, but I do promise to send you cool stuff:) – Cheers, Austin

If you’d like to contact me personally, please do so at

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